When it comes to filing for a divorce, the process may be a complicating one, regardless if you and your spouse are having a peaceful separation or not. However, when it comes to getting what you want in a divorce settlement, it is very common that spouses will agree to use the route of mediation in order to reach a more fair and reasonable agreement with their soon-to-be ex. Mediation is a means utilizing the legal system without having to worry about the pressures and pains of divorce court, and the associated fees that tag along with it.
When choosing the route of mediation, it is important to realize that this means you will be using a third party member (the mediator) in order to direct the negotiations between you and your spouse. You will want to have the oversight of your own personal divorce lawyer while using the mediation process to ensure that your rights are represented during the process and to give you direction for legal matters.
One aspect of medication that your attorney will want to educate you on is the topic of negotiation, and what it means. First off, mediation is a way to avoid court litigation, so remember negotiation is not a trial but rather a discussion to reach an agreement. Lawyers will want to prep their clients to understand this important difference as it will allow them to remember to have a more open mind with regards to their agreements while at the same time seeking to obtain what they would like as well. Negotiation can be defined as simply allowing the opportunity for you and your spouse to cooperate with each other for the sake of reaching a settlement and avoiding court.
Theories on negotiation (and therefore mediation) show that the best outcome for a couple can be reached when the people approach the table with a balance of various characteristics. The balances that need to be found include learning how to not only appreciate the interests of the other person, but also knowing when to assert your own interests in eh matters. Empathy and assertiveness are two unique qualities that when used in balance can make for a smooth negotiation. It is important to realize that you will still want to aim for your preferences, but you can still approach this in a way that it is not “war time” but rather conversation which will involve compromise at times.
If you or your spouse are considering a divorce but you would like to avoid litigation, consider contacting the Hopper Law Office to discuss mediation with a trusted Raleigh divorce lawyer who cares. Our firm is highly experienced and we want to help those in our community. Contact us for further details today.